For once, i'm not afraid of anything.

Not even afraid that you'll leave me.

What does it show?

Screw you, you have ruined my life bitch.

Fuck you. You are the one that has ruined my life.

Fuck, why can't I just forget everything?! Why does it still ring in my head.

It has been fucking four long year. FOUR YEARS.

Stupid bitch.

I still feel fucking insecure. fuck. Im really just making life so miserable for him.

why? freaking hell, i wanna know why too.

others are probably living life perfectly well, while mine is just filled with shit.

Shit from work, shit from insecurities. Fuck life. well, Fuck MY life.

grow? i dont see how am I growing. not in a year or in any million other years.

why do i always get into this kind of shit and never get out?

Why must i go through so much trauma.

everything works well for your good? i dont reckon that.

I feel like my world is just turning all upside down. No good feeling about it.

here he is outside, supposing to enjoy himself. but im ruining it all for him.

why must a good day always end this way?

Jesus, if you say you are here, you are God, DO SOMETHING,

fucking do something.

My faith is dropping pit bottom low.

I've got minimal strength left from running all this crap races.

I feel like I cant breathe anymore. i cant face all this.

work? I dont know how to handle it myself.

r/s? what is it anyway? I cant think.

I cant fucking breathe. it haunts me. it really haunts me.

end it please. will you just end it please.

Just give me back my smile. a smile that really comes from within. It hurts me even to say this.

I dont know what am i living for. really.

this is....

Heartaches, heartbreaks are just the words that comes to my mind, the feelings that I feel when I see my parents and their kids.
I feel so lost. There's just so many things in my mind now. So many things I keep thinking of to do just to save the childcare. But after today's talk, it just seems likethere's just very little hope left for the people.
Stupid, just because of a promise, you make everyone suffer, how is that good for everyone? How is that? How on earth is that?
I feel like crying. My children cannot suffer. My parents cannot suffer. My centre cannot close down.
I don't know what to do now, jesus please help.
I disagree with what pastor prince said.
Freak. This is just mad, really mad.

The last

I've decided to close this blog, not gonna update here anymore because I find that there's no meaning to it.

So, goodbye.

Dear Darrel, Army day 86

Tiring day todayyyyyyyyyy :(
Nothing much to say, too lazy to type.
Anyways, my kids are so excited for the concert!
They wore their costumes and they are all ready to dance! :)

Miss you babe, so much!