Dear Darrel, Army day 58, not in house day 5

All hasnt been that smooth really, but it has been quite good, God was really good to me :)
I can't tell exactly how it has been, but it was really just very good :)

I felt...simply quite amazing just even thinking bout it :)
Love this kind of feeling :)

ok, I dont know what to say, but I just feel really loved, by everyone :)
Hahaha, especially my man :)
Just love him so much :)

Dear Darrel, Army day 56 : Nothing feels right when I'm not with you

Darrel leong! You better be ok!

I miss you, really very much :(

I feel like running to you, give you a big hug, give you a big kiss.

I miss you, so much, so much.

Every single minute, I'll just keep looking at my phone, hoping you'll call back.

The whole day, it has just been like that.

Stupid army, hate you to the core, for taking away my man!

1 year plus more, I dont know how to do this.

JESUS! YOU HAVE GOT TO BRING ME THROUGH THIS!

Feel like i'm going on a 'darrel craze' again....

Miss you, handsome boy :(

Dear Darrel, Army day 55, Not in my house Day 1

Day 55 in army! (If i am accurate in my counting) Haha!
And on this day, you are out field, soooo, i bet it has been a really great day for you! :)

Really miss you alot boy!
But God has been really faithful and really good to me :)
Rmb what I told you about the cry out to God? If i didnt, i just told God to bring me through this and HE HAS TO, because I dont want to cry anymore and I dont want to feel the sucky feeling which I have been feeling the whole day : Going home to a place which is not even my house.

Yeap! But, suprisingly, even as these thoughts came, God just kept giving me a really nice, sweet feeling. I dont know how to explain it but is was really nice.
Like he just kept showing my pictures of the new house (even though the pictures, I think, aree according to my own imagination) But God really just kept showing me of the new house.
& as I was just walking back, I was quite excited bout it and I actually told myself this :"Wenhui, no point crying anymore. Dont look back'
Something like that, it was like a happy thought, not those depressing ones :)

Praise Jesus :)

Babe! We went bowling again just now,
& I really wished that you were there.
Because only you would look at me, every single time I walk back from the bowling lane and give me a smile.
Know why I got reminded of that?
Cause a few times when I walk back, the both of them were just talking to each other.
& it just strike me, that, you are different :)
You will always give me a smile when I walk back towards you. There is really no one time that you have never done that before :)
& It's really such a sweet feeling, only one which I understand and know what is it for :)

Love you so much sweety.
Every day, I am just getting chances and revelations and times for me to appreciate, thank God, and thank You for all these while.
Without you and Jesus, I dont think it would have been easy for me to make it here s far :)

Love you baby, very much! See you soon!
I miss you!

Dear Darrel, Army day 54

I just want to let you know that I am extremely blessed to be your girl.

It hasn't been an all simple journeyt throughout this relationship,

but it has really been a super great walk with you thus far :)

I never want this relationship to end.

As much as I know, and what we believe together, we are going to get married! :)

Haha! Just want to say thankyou for being here with me at my down moments,

always giving me encouragement.

Especially during my shifting house period, thankyou for being with me and my family :)

You are my precious man and I'll say it again : That I'll never give you up for anything in this world, I promise :)

I love you.

Dear Jesus,

I don't wanna cry anymore.
I know this is going to be something good and I want to run with my family on this.
I wanna put my feelings and emotions aside and not cry anymore.
As much as it is going to be hard for me to take, I am going to be strong, and go through this.
Thankyou Daddy, you settle my heart and let it go where you want me to.

I know I will miss those times that I had in this house, but things will be even more and more better right?
It shall all be ok.
STOP CRYING WENHUI STOP STOP STOP STOP!

Why is it so hard to put my emotions down?
I really hate it.
I hope this wont last long.....

JESUS, YOU HAVE TO HELP ME GO THROUGH THIS!!

Dear Darrel, Army day 52

So, its lousy crap that I am feeling right now because i'm gonna shift house in 3 days time.

I don't know.
I've been living in this house...like ever since I was born.
So so so many things happened in this house that I'm living in.

The ups and downs that my family gone through.
The ups and downs that we had internally within the family.
The things that me and Darrel did, like my birthday suprise, countdown and such.

There are just too too many memories that I am going to carry away, but leaving my house down for some other people to live in. That is just what I cannot bring myself to think about.

Sigh. I can't think, my brains can't think.
I wanna cry, my heart wants to cry.
I will miss this house, my body will miss this house.
I will never ever forget this house, my soul will never forget this house.

JESUS!!! WHY?

Dear Darrel, Army day 49

I just enjoy spending time with you :)

That's what defines my whole day today.

Even when things got a lil awkward here and there, but it always gets better :)

Love the prayer he made before we had our dinner.

It goes something like this :' thankyou jesus for the food we have.

Thankyou jesus you will not let us quarrel anymore.

Thankyou JESUS, YOU WILL BE IN OUR RELATIONSHIP!

Thankyou Jesus for everything that we have.

The more wenhui eats, the slimmer she will get. Amen.'

What a short, but sweet and powerful prayer :)

I mean, the way he said it, you could just feel it coming deep from his heart.

Thankyou babe, for being so wonderful.

Even when i give you loads of problem, you never fail to still keep pushing on, and not just giving up on me. there are many many many many, still many times, of me giving you stupid and irritating problems, but you will always and still be that boy.

I've really got no words to describe you because you are really awesome.

We are not perfect, but we've got Jesus in our relationship :)

I love you baby. you are really very sweet and awesome :)

Promise to post pictures up for you soon! :D

They say I don't know how to treasure you.

They say I can't be a good girlfriend.

They say I am selfish.

They say I am just plain useless.

They say I am just not worthy to be your girl.

I think I am finally starting to see what they mean.

thanks for pointing out to me. I get it, I really get it now.

I can't say more than the five sentences that describes who I am now.

My heart hurts like mad.

I'm alone at home, I'm being told to do so many stupid things now.

I really want to...just end everything now.

It hurts so badly. I've been hurting you so badly.

I'm sorry, I just see things in a negative manner always.

Change?

don't tell me bout them anymore.

I can't change for you, somehow, it just doesnt happen that way for me.

I don't wanna continue talking about how pathetic my life is anymore.

It isn't actually. It is very blessed, but I just didn't know how to count my blessings.

I take things for granted.

I do best at making and creating trouble for people.

that is what wenhui is created for.

Nothing but trouble.

I can't be a blessing to my family, my boyfriend, my children.

Only creates mess and mess and more mess.

Wenhui is screwed up.

Nobody loves wenhui.

Dear Darrel, Army day 47, post 1000

Dear darrel! Hahaha!
SO THE PAST ONE WEEK WAS YOUR POP BREAK! :)
Had a very fun and good time with you! :)
Will post up the pictures later on :)

My sentences are ending with smileys because you just made my long and tiring day feel so much better, just after hearing your voice :)
Really praise God for you :D Thanks sweetheart, appreciate and love you very much :D

so the past week was just filled with you and you only, not caring about work and school. Feels so shiok, feels so great, just seeing you almost everyday :)
Cause that's something I don't get to experience anymore, only when army ends :)
Hehe but I'll be waiting for YOU!

Sorry for not blogging everyday, like what I've promised you. Broke my promise, but I'm really sorry. Sometimes I'm really very tired! Thanks for understanding dear boy :)

Really happy that I am going to see you tmr, because you are gonna book out tmr, but go back in on the next day and book out on that same day and book in only on monday night. Makes no sense? I love you :)

Love you when you show me your jealousy :)
Love you when you are you :D
Thankyou for being everything that you are and everything that God has made you to be, to be a blessing, to me :)

Love you baby. I'm gonna go sleep now! Post pictures tmr or something! :D
*hugs*

I don't know where to turn today.
everything seem so.......yuck.
I feel so tired, like there's just no energy level in me today.
I keep losing my patience at my kids.
I feel really very tired, feel so irritated, feel so lifeless.

I think the crying moment is coming soon...it has been a really long time since I've last cried.
sigh. no one? anyone?
with you here, still feels the same, as though you're not.

gonna go talk to my boss now.
save me, anybody?

no army day, just book out day!

like i've saiddddd.....
so, today was quite a relax day.
early morning to darrel's to have breakfast, then we went walk walk at ntuc.
went home, slept for awhile then we went shopping at orchard... :)
met with pui and shaun and paul to jam :)

so today is just like that.
everything is just......slow.....
happy that i bought clothes today! :D woo!

ok darrel, we're both going to go sleep now.
night! toodles!

AH BOY POP LO! :D

Dear Darrel, Army day 45

HELLO BABY BOY!
YOU WILL BE POPING IN LESS THAN 12 HOURS TIME!
I HOPE YOU ARE ALL READY!
ROAD MARCH NOW RIGHT!
HAVE FUN KKKK SWEETHEART!
I'LL SEE YOU IN A WHILE!!!!!

HUGS!

IM TYPING ALL IN CAPS IS BECAUSE I AM VERY EXCITEEDDDDDD! :D
CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU TMR BABY!